Masturbation Guilt hits home.

I accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Saviour multiple times. In church, understand, they push this on you regularly. Couple that with my Christian elementary school, and I was accepting JC all over the place. To the best of my knowledge, Jesus doesn't care if you feel His presence like other Christians. If you truly accept Him, in a heartfelt manner, then you are saved. So, lest you charge I was not a true Christian, think again. Being Christian doesn't require you to be social, or to speak in tongues, or prophesy. I didn't feel compelled to do these things, but I was a Christian, and that was that.

Here are a few memories I have of walking and talking with my Lord:

In either 5th or 6th grade, and over and above all actions in church and elsewhere, I distinctly remember accepting Jesus into my heart on two separate occasions while getting ready for bed. I repeated the action, because I was scared that it didn't "take" the first time.

In 7th grade, I remember praying to Jesus and asking Him to deliver me a girlfriend. In fact, her name was Laura Wells. I actually made a deal with Jesus: Let me go out with Laura, and I'll stop choking my chicken. I'm not sure how long I intended the beating hiatus to be in effect, but I imagine that I thought I'd never do it again. Needless to say, Jesus didn't deliver, and neither did I.

From ~5th - 8th grades, I was a masturbation phenom. Unfortunately, I was also a Christian, and I'm sure you all know what that means: Masturbation Guilt. Oh, how I would pray and pray for strength from Jesus to resist my urges. Ten minutes later, I'm praying to Jesus again asking forgiveness for being sinful. And on and on it went. When my prayers for a girlfriend (see above) went unanswered, I jerked it with a ferocity previously unknown to me, merely to spite Jesus. Predictably though, like a hungover man at an AA meeting, I was back in contact with JC, asking forgiveness.
And so it went. Asking the Lord for strength, courage, and forgiveness, typically in that order. Regardless, I knew Jesus was in my Heart, and I was going to Heaven.